A DBZ Christmas Carol
by Jesscheaux
Summary: *Complete* Charles Dickens' classic tale with a DBZ twist. Join Piccolo as he becomes one heck of a new kind of Scrooge!
1. Bah Humbug!

A DBZ Christmas Carol  
  
Written by: Jesscheaux  
  
Disclaimer: I did not invent, nor do I own, DB/Z/GT or any of the characters.  
I claim no rights whatsoever to A Christmas Carol, that belongs to Charles Dickens.  
  
Author's notes: I've been noticing that people have been writing a bunch of holiday  
fics and then the thought crossed my mind that it would be hilarious if I did a   
DBZ version of A Christmas Carol. This is my interpretation which will (hopefully)  
be humorous at times. I cast Piccolo as Scrooge because he's perfect for the part!  
Yes, I have taken poetic license because of failure to find a copy of the story but   
I tried to stick with the main story-line. ENJOI!  
  
The cast is as follows but I let them keep their names mostly:  
  
Scrooge: Piccolo  
  
Bob Crachit: Goku   
  
Tiny Tim: Goten and the rest of the Crachit family will be Chi-chi and Gohan.  
  
Jacob Marley: Kami  
  
Ghost of Christmas past: Puar  
  
Ghost of Christmas present: Ox King  
  
Ghost of Christmas future: Vegeta  
  
Mr.and Mrs. Fizzywig: Krillin and 18  
  
the girl that he doesn't marry (I can't remember her name): Jesscheaux (me!)  
  
Scrooge's Nephew: Dende  
  
The charitable collectors: Tien and Chaoutzu  
  
the people selling his stuff in Christmas future: Bulma, Trunks and Yamcha.  
  
I can't think of anymore parts right now, but I'm going to try and work in  
Master Roshi, Oolong, maybe Supreme Kai, Hercule, Videl and whoever else  
is important and cool!   
  
____________________________________________________________________________________  
  
Kami was dead. Dead as a doornail. He had been in his grave for many a year.  
  
(Author's note: yes I know, if Kami dies then Piccolo dies but disregard that for  
purposes of the story)  
  
It was a haunted evening in which we first see the namek they call Piccolo Scrooge.  
He kept to himself most of the time living alone in his stone cold house. It was empty  
and had many rooms for he had all the money in the world, but no one to share it with.  
His partner had been Kami Marley. In all the years they worked together, they took  
from the poor and enjoyed it heartily.  
  
Still at his business was the greedy miser counting the days riches at a hard wooden  
desk. He sat in a large comfortable chair but still had his coat on for it was  
freezing inside and out. Piccolo was too tight to use precious coal to light a fire.  
  
His clerk, Goku Crachit, was taking down the day's business in a large ledger with  
a feather pen and an ink well. His orange clothes were shabby and torn and his  
gloves had no fingers. Goku would pause every few seconds to rub his hands together  
only to get a harsh look from Scrooge; he would immediately begin to work again.  
  
  
The door banged open as Piccolo's nephew Dende entered the shop with a Christmas wreath.  
  
"Uncle Piccolo!!!!!!! Merry Christmas!" shouted the young namek.  
  
"Harumph. Merry is it? Bah! What do you want, Dende?"  
  
"Just to wish you a Merry Christmas and give this wreath." he announced while handing it to  
Piccolo.  
  
Piccolo just looked at it funny. Just then, two citizens who were collecting for the poor  
entered the cold room.  
  
"Hey Piccolo!" shouted Tien and Chaoutzu. "Wanna give us some money?" Chaoutzu asked.  
  
Piccolo became very irritated. "WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?! You know I'm not going  
to give you a dime." he said with a snort and put his nose in the air.  
  
"You're no fun. It's Christmas!" Tien insisted.  
  
"Christmas. Bah humbug! I don't celebrate that foolishness."  
  
"Well, you could at least donate some money to the poor."  
  
"Ha! The poor are only taking up space. They should leave this place so we don't  
have to waste our money caring for them."  
  
Chaoutzu pouted. "Meany....." he whispered.  
  
"GET OUT OF HERE NOW!" Piccolo yelled.  
  
"What about the donation?" asked Tien.  
  
"I SAID NO!" Piccolo then grabbed the wreath from Dende's head and flung it  
as hard as he could at Chaoutzu. It went over his head and twirled around his   
feet.  
  
Goku looked up from his desk. "Nice shot, Piccolo!"  
  
Piccolo growled at Goku and said "Get back to work, Crachit!"  
  
"Yes sir!" Goku said.  
  
Tien and Chaoutzu left the room with Chatouzu still holding the wreath.   
"Thanks for the wreath!" the little emperor said cheerily.  
  
"ARRRGH!" Piccolo yelled as he slammed the door behind them. "Now Dende, would you  
mind? We're still finishing up our work."  
  
"Oh, sorry Uncle Piccolo. I wanted to invite you to my Christmas party tomorrow.  
You wanna come? Mr. Popo is cooking up lots of good stuff!"  
  
"Dende you fool, we don't eat, remember?" Piccolo grunted in a very aggrated tone.  
  
Dende smacked his forehead. "Oh yeah! Well, we are importing a bunch of water. Sound  
good? You'll come right?"  
  
"I told you NO! I don't celebrate Christmas. I never have and I never will."  
  
"Ok then, but if you change your mind the invitation still stands!" Dende said excited  
and skipped away with a final "Merry Christmas!"  
  
"Merry Christmas to you too Dende!" Goku yelled after him and then cowered when  
he saw Piccolo's disapproving glare.  
  
  
The old grandfather clock struck 8 o'clock and Goku jumped for joy. He began putting  
his tools away.   
  
Piccolo looked up gruffly and said, "You may go now, Crachit. I'll see you at 8 o'clock  
tomorrow morning."  
  
Goku's face fell, "But Mr. Scrooge?" he protested.  
  
"What?" was the harsh answer.  
  
"Tomorrow is Christmas!"  
  
"So what? I don't care about all the silly human holidays. You will be here tomorrow  
at 8 or lose your job, Goku."  
  
"*clears throat* but I'm not a human."  
  
Piccolo rolled his eyes. "What are you suggesting, Goku? You want the day off?"  
  
Goku nodded.  
  
An aggravated grunt followed as Piccolo thought it over. "No."  
  
"But but but.......it's the holidays! Everybody celebrates, Christmas, even Vegeta!"  
  
"Vegeta?! That's hard to believe."  
  
"It's true! And I'd like to spend the day with my family. Besides, none of the other  
business' will be open, so there's no one to do business with."  
  
"You do have a point. Very well, Goku. Go and celebrate your silly Christmas. I want  
nothing to do with it."  
  
"THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!" Goku screamed and tried to hug Piccolo who blocked  
him with his fist.  
  
"Back off, I said go. NOW."  
  
"Sure sure. Whatever you say. (to himself) Oh boy oh boy! Chi-chi, Gohan, and tiny  
Goten sure are going to be happy!"  
  
Piccolo's ears perked up at the sound of Gohan's name. "Gohan, eh? Well, you're lucky,  
it's only for his sake that I let you go. So, get out!"  
  
Goku nodded and flashed his famous grin at the agitated Piccolo and ran out the  
door. He ran down the street clicking his heels together and shouting "Merry Christmas!"  
to everyone he passed.  
  
  
Piccolo watched him go and shook his head at the man's foolishness. "Christmas. Bah Humbug!"  
He then put on his cape and turban and headed home himself.   
  
He walked down the long cold streets to his mansion. Everywhere he went people would  
stare at him strangely and back away. Wherever there was laughter it soon ceased  
as Piccolo Scrooge passed by.  
  
"Bakas." Piccolo muttered as he retrieved the key to open the door of his mansion which  
was as empty and cold as his heart.  
He unlocked the door and reached for the knob. All of a sudden, the knocker that was  
once shaped like a dragon, turned into the face of his old partner, Kami Marley.  
  
"Picccccolooooo." he said eerily and disappearead as suddenly as he came.  
  
Piccolo jumped back. "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?!"  
Piccolo decided it was just his imagination and he went inside to drink his nightly  
bottle of water and then go to sleep.  
  
Piccolo dressed in his pajamas (hee hee! funny mental picture) and robe and made  
a small fire. He sat in his favorite chair and enjoyed his solitary bottle of water.  
  
It was awfully quiet in the large house. A little too quiet. Piccolo sighed and just  
kept drinking while thinking about his boring day. A faint clinking sound was heard his  
extra-sensitive ears picked it up right away. He turned his head rapidly and the clinking  
stopped.   
  
Piccolo shook his head. "It must be my imagination again."  
  
The clinking started up again a moment later getting louder with each second.  
It came up the stairs and and closer to Piccolo.  
  
"HUH?! Now I'm really losing it! What is that?"  
  
A voice came eerily from the behind the door. "Picccccoloooooooo!"  
  
Piccolo bolted up out of his chair as he recognized it. "KAMI?!"  
  
What happened next was most surprising. A white being entered the room, going right through  
the door. Piccolo stared in disbelief at what he was sure was Kami's ghost. He was covered  
in chains that wrapped around his body. Some had large locks and boxes attached.  
  
The ghost of Kami put his hands on his hips and said: "Well now, don't you recognize your old  
partner, Piccolo?"  
  
Piccolo backed away and said: "It's you, Kami?"  
  
"Yes, it's me."  
  
"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be resting or counseling the dead or something?"  
  
"Yes, I do that too. But I am here to warn you."  
  
"Warn me? Of what?"  
  
"Do you see these chains?" Kami asked while gesturing towards himself.  
  
Piccolo nodded.  
  
"These were the chains I acquired throughout my life by doing selfish deeds and not  
helping others. I will be forever bound because of my foolishness in this life.  
I am here to tell you that your fate will be the same if you do not change  
your ways, Piccolo. For I see that your chains are longer and heavier than mine."  
  
"NO! That can't be true! You're not real! You're just a bad dream. Must've been that  
cheap water I drank. I usually only drink Ozarka. But no, tonight I drank the Wal-mart  
brand."  
  
"You cannot deny the truth. Change your ways, Piccolo. Tonight you will be visited by  
three ghosts the first at the stroke of 1 am. They will help you. Listen to them  
and abide by what they say, or your fate will be worse than even mine." Kami finished  
and started fading away.  
  
"Kami! No! This can't be true, I refuse to believe it!" Piccolo shook his head violently  
trying to find and explanation for it all. He decided to go straight to bed and be rid  
of this image by collapsing into sleep. He went into his dark room, crawled under the  
covers, blew out the candle and pulled the sheets around his bed.  
  
"Three ghosts and the first at the stroke of one. Yeah right, that old man was always   
insane in life anyway." Piccolo said to himself as he drifted off into a dreamless sleep.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________  
That's the first installment! I'm going to be working on the other ones very SOON!  
Tell me what you thought? Do you like it? Is it good so far? Don't forget to check  
out my other fics too ;) Ja ne everybody! 


	2. Christmast Past and Present.

A DBZ Christmas Carol  
  
  
Written by: Jesscheaux  
  
  
Disclaimer: I did not invent, nor do I own, DB/Z/GT or any of the characters.  
I take no credit whatsoever for A Christmas Carol. It all belongs to Charles Dickens.  
  
Author's Notes: Ok, I have decided to make a big change to my story. I'm changing  
the part of the ghost of Christmas present from Ox King to: the one and only  
HERCULE! That's right folks, THE MAN. THE ONE WHO KILLED CELL! YEAAAAAAAAAHHHH!  
Yeah right, he wishes..... Anyway, I thought it would make the story funnier.  
So, read on!  
_______________________________________________________________________________________  
  
The night wore on and the grandfather clock in the old empty mansion stroke one.  
  
*DONG*  
  
Piccolo rolled over in his sleep, mumbling something. He then began to awake as he felt  
the presence of a strange being enter his room.  
He rubbed his eyes as he sat upright. All through his bed curtains, a light shone through.  
Piccolo pulled them back and immediatley covered his eyes because of the brightness.  
  
"What's going on!" he shouted.  
  
The glowing being came into clearer view and revealed the first ghost. It looked uncannily  
like a blue cat.  
  
"Picccoooooloooooo....." chanted the ghost.  
  
  
"Yeah, ok, you know my name. Now, what do you want?"  
  
"Piccolo, I am the ghost of Christmast past." Puar told him.  
  
"*yawn* Sure and I'm Bill Clinton." Piccolo retorted.  
  
Puar squeaked loudly causing Piccolo to cover his ears. "I AM! And whether you like it or  
not, I'm going to show you your Christmas past."  
  
"Bah. Humbug. I don't care about Christmas. Especially not about my past."  
  
"Take my hand and see for yourself." Puar insisted.  
  
Piccolo looked at her and tilted his head. "What hand? All I see are paws."  
  
"*sigh* Whatever! Anyway, take my 'paw' and I will show you the past."  
  
Piccolo rolled his eyes. "Fine, let's get this over with."  
He then took Puar's paw and they began to fly out of the window and into the distance.  
  
Puar took them up above all of the town and then farhter out where a light shone.  
They reached the light and touched down in a schoolyard.  
  
"Does this look familiar to you, Piccolo?" Puar asked.  
  
"It does!" he exclaimed rather bewildered. "This is where I went to school! And look, there  
are all my schoolmates playing out in the yard."  
  
"Yes, but where are you, Piccolo?"  
  
"Look over there." He said, pointing to underneath a tree in the snowy yard. "That's me, meditating  
under the tree."  
  
"Why aren't you playing with the other children?"  
  
"Because, I'm a freak. They don't like me and all I have is myself. I don't even have a father."   
he murmured and looked down.  
  
"Spirit, take me away from this place. I don't want to see anymore."  
  
"Very well. We shall go a little bit further now."   
  
They begin to glow and Puar transports them to a little shop in the middle of the city.  
  
"Look." Puar said to Piccolo.  
  
Piccolo walked up to the shop and read the sign. "Mr. Fizzywig's. AH! My first job! I used  
to work here for Fizzywig when I was a young boy."  
  
"Yes. Look inside, today is Christmas Eve."  
  
Piccolo walked up to the window and rubbed the fog off of one of the panes. Inside, there  
were lots of people, including the Fizzywigs and Kami Marley.  
  
"There they are! And there's my old partner Kami!"  
  
"And there you are, being shy and not talking to anybody."  
  
"Hmmmph. I never know what to say."  
  
A young girl then walks up to Piccolo and they begin to talk.  
  
"Look." said Puar, "Do you recognize her?"  
  
Piccolo's eyes widened as he saw the girl he was in love with so many years ago. "Jesscheaux?"  
  
Piccolo then entered the room and watched himself and Jesscheaux as they used to be long ago.  
  
"Hi, my name is Jesscheaux." the girl said.  
  
The younger Piccolo looked at her bashfully and muttered. "I'm Piccolo."  
  
"Well, hello Piccolo. It's nice to meet you! Would you care to dance?"  
  
Younger Piccolo looked like he was about to refuse but then decided to dance with her.  
  
  
Piccolo Scrooge turned away from the scene. "Spirit, I can take no more. Please let us leave  
this place."  
  
"But where shall we go? You said that you would always be together."  
  
"I know." he said quietly.  
  
Puar transported him to a place in the forest where Jesscheaux and his younger self were talking.  
"Look. Look what has become of you and your greed."  
  
"Piccolo?" asked Jesscheaux.  
  
Younger Piccolo just grunted in answer.  
  
"Do you love me?"  
  
"Of course I do." Younger Piccolo answers quietly and then takes her hand. "Why would you think  
anything else?"  
  
Jesscheaux hung her head. "Because, you're always working now. What about us? Are we ever going  
to get married and start a family?"  
  
Younger Piccolo became taken aback and withdrew his hand from Jesscheaux's grasp.  
"Not yet. We have to wait until I've made enough Zeni."  
  
Jesscheaux shook her head. "That's all you ever say, Piccolo. I can't wait that long. If you really  
love me, then we'll be together now."  
  
Younger Piccolo hung his head. "I can't right now. I told you in the future."  
  
Jesscheaux began to quietly sob. "So, that's how it is? You love your money more than me.  
Just know, that I will always save a place in my heart for you. Goodbye, Piccolo."  
And with that, Jesscheaux walked out of his life forever. (well not really, but in this story she does  
If you want to find out more about Jesscheaux  
who she is and her relationship with Piccolo  
read The Spectrum Revolution!)  
  
The present Piccolo felt a hot tear begin to form in his eye as he looked away quickly.  
"No.........Spirit! Get me out of here! I can't take this anymore!"  
  
"But Piccolo," insisted Puar. "That is your past. You chose it."  
  
"I know. And I was wrong. But what's done is done. Let us leave this place."  
  
Puar bowed her head. "As you wish, Piccolo." And with a blinding flash of light  
Piccolo was transported back to his bedroom.  
  
"Leave me, Spirit, so I can be alone with these haunting thoughts."  
  
"Very well. But the second spirit is yet to come. He shall be here at the stroke  
of two. Be aware, he is alot more hyper and jolly than I am."  
  
"Whatever." Piccolo said harshly and went back to his bead, pulling the curtains around it again.  
  
  
*DONG DONG* The grandfather clock stroke two.  
  
A yell was heard coming from inside Piccolo's room: "YEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"  
  
Piccolo bolted upright, getting ready to strangle this newcomer, ghost or no ghost.  
  
He angrily ripped the bed-curtains open and opened his mouth to yell when he saw:  
The ghost of Christmas present. He was a tall, (but not as tall as Piccolo) muscular  
man, wearing a maroon fighting gi with a holly wreath in his strangely afro-like hair.  
  
"Yo!" screamed the ghost. "You better come out here and get ready to know me better man!"  
  
"I am out here you twit." Piccolo responded, "And who are you supposed to be?"  
  
Hercule flashed his 100-watt grin and did a little twirl on his foot. "I AM THE MIGHTY HERCULE!  
PROTECTOR OF THIS PLANET AND THE ONE WHO DEFEATED CELL!" Hercule yelled out triumphantly.  
  
"Ummmm, you're supposed to be a ghost or something." Piccolo said aggravatedly.  
  
Hercule looked stumped for a moment and then snapped his fingers. "Oh yeah! I'm that too.  
But a very powerful ghost, mind you."  
  
"Whatever."  
  
"And I'm here to show you some fun, Piccolo! YEAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! Let's get this party started!"  
  
"Great, I just can't wait." Piccolo said sarcastically and rolled his eyes.  
  
"Come on!" Hercule cried and grabbed his hand. They were instantly transported to outside in  
the city where Christmas was going in full swing.  
  
"Merry Christmas, everybody! YEAAAAAAAAHHHHH!" Hercule shouted at the town and did a bunch of  
his punching and kicking moves. A group of little kids ran up and asked for his autograph.  
Hercule obliged and signed all the autographs. He patted the last kid on the head as he handed  
him back a piece of paper that read:   
  
To my weak little buddy who will never grow up to be as strong as me, but that's ok   
because no one needs anybody stronger when you've got me around-- Hercule, the ghost of Christmas present.  
  
  
After he finished signing he looked at Piccolo and said: "Look around you, man. It's Christmas Day!"  
  
Piccolo crossed his arms and spit on the ground. "And I care why?"  
  
Hercule tilted his head and thought for a moment. "Everyone is happy around Christmas. It's a time for  
love, sharing, and family."  
  
"Hummph. Things I've never had, nor been good at." Piccolo retorted icily.  
  
"Well, that's not true. You have your Nephew, Dende. Why don't we go see what he's up to?"  
  
Piccolo sighed and looked away. "Sure, it's not like I have anything better to do."  
  
In a flash, he and Hercule were transported to Dende's place where he and Mr. Popo were having  
their party. Also there, was Krillin, #18, Marron, and Master Roshi.  
Master Roshi was looking at some of his magazines with girls wearing Santa suits in them.  
  
"Hee hee! Krillin, look at this one!" Roshi exclaimed.  
  
Krillin sighed and said: "No thanks, man. Why don't you have some egg nog?"  
  
"Don't mind if I do." he answered and took the glass Krillin handed him.  
  
Dende entered the room just then: "Water for everybody!!!!!! Bring in on out, Mr. Popo."  
Dende was attired in a festive holiday suit, complete with a sprig of holly.  
  
Piccolo glared at his newphew from the corner he was standing in. "That baka. He looks ridiculous  
with that outfit on, although it is a change from the usual dress he wears. I'd like to take that  
sprig of holly and shove it through his heart....."  
  
"Now now! He's your only living relative!" Hercule protested and clapped Piccolo on the back  
heartily. "Watch, and let's see what happens."  
  
Everyone drank a bottle of the special water and Dende decided they should play a little  
game. "Anyone up for a game?"  
  
"Sure!" Krillin chimed in. "What're we going to play?"  
  
Dende thought for a moment and snapped his fingers: "I know! Charades! I'll go first."  
Dende then put a huge frown on his face, pulled himself up to his full height and crossed  
his arms. He then frowned deeper and looked away.  
  
Master Roshi and Krillin started yelling out guesses: "Uh, is it a policeman? NO! I got it  
a hardened criminal? Nah, it must be a tree? I dunno, Dende who is it?"  
  
Dende broke into a huge smile and said: "My Uncle Piccolo!!!"  
  
A look of understanding dawned on their faces. "Yeah!!!" Krillin exclaimed. "He's always frowning like that."  
  
"Yeah," Master Roshi agreed, "That guy needs to loosen up and get a life. He's just terrible and greedy too."  
  
#18 said: "That green monster is despicable, Dende. I can't believe you're related to him. I want nothing to  
do with that old miser."  
  
Piccolo was stunned at their words. "Spirit, do they really think of me like that?"  
  
Hercule grinned, "Well ya saw it for yourself! Let's go someplace else and see Christmas, YEAAAAAHHHH!"  
Hercule said cornily and they transported to a shabbier part of the town.  
  
"What are we doing here?" Piccolo asked as he saw their surroundings.   
  
Hercule pointed to a small house. "Look, this is Goku Crachit's house. Inside they're preparing for  
Christmas dinner."  
  
Piccolo and Hercule stood by the window and watched as Mrs. Crachit and her older son finished cooking.  
  
"Now, Gohan. Keep turning the goose over the fire, or it'll never be done in time." Chi-chi instructed.  
  
"Yes, mom." answered Gohan and resumed his task.  
  
"We have to be ready for when your father and Tiny Goten get home."  
  
Just then, the door opened and in strode Goku with Tiny Goten on his shoulders.   
  
"Dad!" exclaimed Gohan and he ran to hug him.   
  
"Hiya, son! Hi Chi-chi!" he greeted his family and gave Chi-chi a kiss.  
  
"Daddy!" exclaimed Tiny Goten, "The church service was great, I especially like the part   
where they sang: "hark the herald angels sing, glory to the new born king *cough cough cough*"  
The youngster began to cough violently.  
  
"Oh no! Son, you have to calm down." said Chi-chi and Goku put him down. "Here. Sit down in your  
chair."  
  
Tiny Goten used a small crutch and limped up to the table painstakingly. His brother then helped him  
sit down and Chi-chi finished setting the table and Gohan put the goose out on it.  
  
"They don't have much to eat." Piccolo observed.  
  
"Yeah, they can't afford any more than that. Not on the salary that you pay him." Hercule answered.  
  
The Crachit family began to eat and laugh and talk about the day's events.  
"I propose a toast to Mr. Piccolo Scrooge," said Goku happily, "To the founder of the feast!"  
  
"Hmmph! That old miser is greedy and I'd like to give him a piece of my mind. Founder of the feast  
indeed." Chi-chi complained.  
  
"Mommy," spoke up Tiny Goten, "It's true. It's all thanks to Mr. Piccolo that we're having a wonderful  
Christmas. Daddy's right."  
  
The look on Chi-chi's face softened. "Allright, to Mr. Piccolo." she said and they toasted each other.  
  
  
Outside, a small smile began to creep onto Piccolo's face. "Such a wonderful family." he murmured.  
Tiny Goten began to cough again and Piccolo's face darkened. "Tell me, what of the boy? Will he  
live?"  
  
"*clears throat* Well, that's the ghost of Christmas future's realm, but I guess I could give you a hint.  
I see an empty chair and a crutch with no owner." Hercule said sadly.  
  
Piccolo's face took on a look of despair. "No, not him. I've got to be able to change it."  
  
"Well come on, man! My time is almost up. I've got a training session scheduled." Hercule then looked  
at his watch: "Yup, almost three o'clock. THEN, the ghost of Christmas future will be here to  
torture you some more. How's that sound?"  
  
Piccolo just grumbled.  
  
"Come on, you know you're starting to like Christmas, aren't you? Aren't you?!"   
  
"*growl* I'm trying not to, but I'm getting this strange feeling all of a sudden. Thanks alot  
you bakayarou!"   
  
Hercule and Piccolo suddenly appeared in a graveyard near a church and the church bell began to  
strike three.  
  
Hercule looked at his watch again, "Whoops! Gotta fly or I'll be late. Can't be late, now can I?  
NOOOOOOOOOOOo!!!! See ya, Pic-man!" he yelled and then climbed up on a chair and jumped up into  
the air. He fell flat on his face.  
  
"What the heck are you trying to do? Kill yourself?" Piccolo asked astonished.  
  
"Nope, can't do that, I'm already dead. I'm trying to fly!"  
  
"Geez, that'll never happen. You're too weak to fly."  
  
"Guess I'll have to take a cab." Hercule said and then shrugged. He whistled and seconds later,  
a cab with the name "Hercule's taxi company" on the side pulled up and he hopped in.  
"BYE!!!" Hercule yelled. "AND DON'T FORGET THAT I KILLED CELL!"  
  
With that he was gone.  
  
"Wait a second.........he can't just leave me here in this graveyard!" Piccolo exclaimed and then  
thought for a moment, "Oh, that's right. There's one more ghost that will visit me. Where is he?  
He's already two mintues late."  
  
Piccolo crossed his arms and leaned up against a large gravestone to wait for the final ghost.  
  
All of a sudden a cloud of fog appeared and Piccolo was enveloped in it. Through the mist  
Piccolo could make out a figure dressed in all black with a cloak covering his entire body.  
The figure barely came up to Piccolo's shoulders.   
  
"Well, let's get this over with." he sighed and walked up to the Ghost of Christmas future.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
CLIFFHANGER!!! Well, sort've. You know who it is, and you know the story. But I'm going to  
need one more installment to finish this off. I hope you've enjoyed it so far. Let me  
know what you think. I'll try to have it out SOON! Ja ne! 


	3. God bless us, every one.

A DBZ Christmas Carol  
  
Written by: Jesscheaux  
  
Disclaimer: I did not invent, nor do I own, DB/Z/GT or any of the characters.  
I take no credit whatsoever for Charles Dicken's "A Christmas Carol".  
  
Author's notes: Ah, the Krillin and 18 as Mr. and Mrs. Fizzywig thing  
just didn't work out :( Oh well, I thought it was better the way it  
turned out. This chap will have Veggie in it! *all Vegeta fans cheer*  
Yeah, I'm a Vegeta fan myself. I hope I don't make him too OOC, I just  
want it to be funny. Enjoy the final chapter and thanks for reading!  
___________________________________________________________________________  
  
*DONG* The final ring of the church bell tolled. It was 3 'o clock.  
  
The black-cloaked spirit remained in it's position, several feet from  
Piccolo. His arms were folded and his posture was very straight as though  
he were royalty.  
  
Piccolo was getting rather annoyed that this new spirit hadn't talked to him,  
so he decided to say something: "Spirit, speak to me. What are you going to  
show me?"  
  
The stranger still said nothing.  
  
Piccolo walked several feet closer and got up in his face.   
  
"Listen here, you're not going to waste MY time. Now, talk to me!"  
  
A low growl emitted from the black cloak. "FINE!" a familiar voice yelled.  
The spirit ripped the hood off of his head to reveal his tall, spiky hair, and  
scowling face.  
"I hated this stupid thing anyway! It's much more fun to be visible so people  
can bow to the Prince when they see me!" Vegeta exclaimed.  
  
Piccolo rolled his eyes, "Oh great, a cocky spirit. So, tell me what kind of  
torture do you have planned?"  
  
Vegeta pointed towards the grave-stones. "I challenge you to a fight, Namek.  
Right here, right now!" Vegeta yelled and began to take off the cloak.  
  
Hercule's disembodied head then appeared as a type of hologram before him.  
"Veg-man!"  
  
The Prince of Saiyans snarled, "I told you not to call me that, baka."  
  
"Whatever. There will be no fighting in this fic, ya hear me?" Hercule demanded.  
"You need to help Piccolo change the future and show him some cool stuff, ok?"  
  
"*snarl* If I must. But I'm going to take my sweet time and torture him a bit."  
  
"Fine with me!" Hercule said and then screamed: "YEAAAAAAHH!!!!!! Well, gotta go,  
you guys have fun!"  
  
Piccolo rolled his eyes for the bazillionth time that night. "These spirts are   
complete idiots." He thought to himself.  
  
"What was that, Namek?" demanded the black-clothed Vegeta.  
  
"Er, nothing. Proceed with the 'torture' spirit." he answered demi-sarcastically.  
  
"Fine. Now see that grave-stone over there?"  
  
"Yeah, so?"  
  
"Well, let's find out more about the man who now lies there."  
  
"Why? This is pointless, Spirit."  
  
"Would you just shut up and do as I say, low class Namek! I'm the Spirit here, not you!"  
  
"Whatever. Just get on with it!"  
  
"Ok, good." Vegeta sneered and snapped his fingers. He and Piccolo were transported to a   
grungy city street. Three people holding bundles walked inside a dingy building with   
a sign that read: Pawn shop.  
  
"Hey Yamcha!" spoke the first person, who just happened to be a blue-haired blue-eyed  
woman.   
  
"Yo, Bulma!" answered the owner of the shop. "What have you got for me today?"  
  
Vegeta growled as he saw them talking, "I thought I told her to stay away from  
that buffoon....."  
  
"Check it out!" she squealed, "I got his boots!"  
  
"Huh, very nice." Yamcha said as he looked over the near-new pair of soft brown  
shoes. "They don't make'em like this anymore.  
  
"Yamcha." Spoke up the second figure, who had lavender colored hair *Trunks fans all scream and faint*  
"I got his bed-sheets!"   
  
Yamcha held them up and noticed: "Hey! These are still warm! I've got to pay you extra for this one, Trunks."  
  
"Thanks, I'm trying to build a time machine and that money will come in handy for parts." (sorry, couldn't resist)  
  
"Still warm, huh?" spoke up the third figure who was a small woman with short black hair and piercing  
purpleish-blue eyes. "Bet that's the only warmth he ever had!" Videl said sardonically and tossed her head  
with an arrogant sniff.  
  
"Yeah, glad he's finally gone." Yamcha agreed. "I heard no one attended his funeral, and I don't blame  
them. What a loser the guy was!"  
  
"And talk about stone cold!" Bulma exclaimed, "He was always frowning down at me. Or maybe that was  
Vegeta..........  
  
Vegeta muttered to himself at that comment and folded his arms. "Stupid woman....."  
  
"So, how much money are you going to give us for these?" Videl asked as she showed him her prize also,  
his walking stick. "This is made in the traditional japanese style."   
  
Yamcha thought for a moment and began doling out money. He gave Bulma 100 zeni for the bed sheets.  
(look, I don't know how much a zeni is so I'm just estimating)  
  
Vegeta smacked his forehead, "Stupid woman! She could get more for those!"  
  
"Spirit," began Piccolo, "Who are these people talking about? Who is this wretched being that is so  
hated?"  
  
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Vegeta taunted him with a smirk.  
  
A thought hit Piccolo and he gasped "I see, I think that this is what could happen to me. But I can change  
it can't I?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"Some Spirit you are."  
  
Vegeta just rolled his eyes. "I have no time for these foolish games. Let's get this over with."  
He snapped his fingers again and they were back in the graveyard.  
  
"Go, Namek." he said and pointed at a gravestone that was overgrown with weeds and not taken care of.  
The stone was frosted over with ice that covered the name and the stone itself was askew.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I said, go! And look at the gravestone. There you will see the name of the 'man' who's fate you  
have witnessed today."  
  
Piccolo frowned, but had to know who it was. He cautiously made his way over to the stone and  
bent down beside it. He looked at Vegeta who only glared at him and gestured for him to look  
at the name.  
  
Slowly, Piccolo brushed the ice away from the stone, to reveal the name: Piccolo Scrooge.  
  
He gasped and clutched at his heart, almost falling backwards. "No. Spirit it can't be true."  
  
"Oh but it is!" Vegeta said gleefully.  
  
"No! This can be changed! I can be a better person. I'll celebrate Christmas........a little."  
  
He ran up to Vegeta and picked him up by the scruff of his coat. "Tell me now! Tell me that I can do  
change this."  
  
Vegeta just laughed and then Piccolo's vision became blurry and he felt himself free-falling.  
Vegeta disappeared and Piccolo awoke with a start. He looked around him and realized that he  
was in his own room again.  
  
He breathed a sigh of relief. "WAIT! It's morning! What day is it, what day?" he ran to the nearest  
window and threw open the shutters. He looked down into the street and saw a young boy with purple  
skin and a white mohawk walking down the snowy street.  
  
"Hey YOU!" he yelled at Supreme Kai, "Yeah you, tell me what day is it?"  
  
"Why Piccolo, it's Christmas Day!"  
  
Piccolo cocked his head. "How did you know my name.........oh nevermind! I'm just glad I didn't miss it!  
The Spirits did it all in one night!"  
  
Supreme Kai just smiled up at him.  
  
"Boy, do you know the prized turkey in the shop around the corner?"  
  
"The one twice my size?"  
  
"Yes that one! Have they sold it yet?"  
  
"No, not yet."  
  
"Here!" he said throwing down a bag of zeni, "Go and buy it for me and keep the change!"  
  
"Thank you, Piccolo!" Supreme Kai answered and flashed a smile at him.  
  
  
Piccolo put on his favorite gi, cape and turban, and headed out on that glorious Christmas day.  
He would've whistled to himself, but since it would terrorize his hearing, decided not to.  
  
Tien and Chaoutzu were standing on a nearby corner and still begging for money.  
  
"Money for the poor, gov'ner?" Tien asked in a fake British accent to the short, fat man  
that just walked by.  
  
"Tien!" Chaoutzu whined, "That man was not a 'gov'ner' and you're NOT British you hypocrite!"  
  
"Well, excuse me for living, weakling." Tien retorted.  
  
Chaoutzu glared at him and the two clenched their fists and were about to lunge at each other  
when Piccolo walked up:  
  
"Merry Christmas!" he exclaimed.  
  
"Mr. Piccolo?" Chaoutz asked amazedly.  
  
"Um *gulp* What are you doing here?" Tien asked.  
  
"Well, I just came to make that donation I promised."  
  
"But you didn't pro--" Chaoutzu was cut off by Tien's hand clamping over his mouth.  
  
"How much did you want to donate?" asked Tien.  
  
"Put me down for-" and Piccolo leaned down and whispered the amount to Tien who almost  
fainted when he heard he.  
  
"So many zeni, so many zeni......." he said dazedly.  
  
Chaoutzu grinned "Thank you, Mr. Piccolo."  
  
"No problem, kid. It's about time I share all my money with those who need it." he answered  
and patted his head. "Have a Merry Christmas!" he shouted and took off towards his next destination.  
  
  
*knock knock* The door opened a moment later and Mr. Popo was standing there staring at the visitor.  
  
"Mr. Piccolo! Please come in." he said hospitably.  
  
"Thanks, and you have a Merry Christmas." Piccolo answered.  
  
Dende was setting up the finishing touches for his party when Piccolo came in. Piccolo grunted  
and Dende turned his head at the noise.  
  
"UNCLE PICCOLO!!!! I knew you'd come!" he said and ran up to hug him.  
  
"Hey, kid. Merry Christmas." Piccolo said quietly as he patted him on the back.  
  
"I'm so glad you're here."  
  
Piccolo stayed there for a little while and then was off for his final destination, bringing Dende and company  
with him.  
  
They met up with the Supreme Kai and they went Goku Crachit's house with the turkey.  
Along the way, they were joined by Yamcha, Bulma, Trunks and Videl.  
  
Piccolo had them all hide around the corner and he knocked on Goku's door.  
  
Goku came to the door promptly and when he opened it Piccolo reprimanded him:  
  
"Ah Crachit, I see you're late for work again. I told you to be there at 8 'o clock sharp."  
  
Goku looked crestfallen, "But you said I could have the day off......"  
  
"Oh I did, did I?"  
  
Chi-chi came up with a frying pan in one hand, "Let me at him, Goku. I'll take that monster out!"  
Goku held her back and started to explain himself.  
  
"I'm sorry Mr. Piccolo but....."  
  
"But nothing! I'm just going to have to raise your salary is all." He said merrily and shrugged.  
  
Goku's mouth dropped open. "R-r-raise my salary?"  
  
"Yes, Goku, raise your salary! Merry Christmas, my friend." and with that the entire gang came   
into the Crachit home and they all had a wonderful feast of the prized turkey.  
  
Piccolo was actually happy and he played with Tiny Goten and Gohan and vowed that he would  
train them.   
  
For many years after that, it was said that if any 'man' knew how to keep Christmas it was  
Piccolo Scrooge. He became a second father to Tiny Goten and Gohan and everyone was happy.  
  
"God bless us, every one." Tiny Goten, who did not die, said as everybody was gathered around  
at the table.  
  
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!" the entire gang chorused and then erupted into joyous laughter. Yes, even  
Piccolo.  
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
There you have it folks! A DBZ Christmas Carol. Sorry this chap took longer to get out than the others.  
I hope you enjoyed it! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to everybody! Thanks for reading, just  
let me know what you thought. Ja ne! 


End file.
